Lessande D'Aramitz

  At The End of the Tunnel

  Lessande D’Aramitz

  Prologue

  I sigh as I feel my senses numbed by the alcohol. Everything is foggy but I can hear a giggle. I look around and I come face to face with her. She gives me one of her dazzling smiles and beckons me to follow her

  "Mmm…" the sound wakes me up to reality, her image dissipating. I look down and see a blonde on her knees, between my legs. I groan internally, realizing this isn't working anymore.

  "Stop!" I say rather harshly but she just raises her head enough to smile at me before taking me again in her mouth. Fuck.

  "Maddie stop!"

  She stops just to pout for a second before giving me another lick.

  "It's Maggie.”

  "Fuck. Maddie, Maggie, I don't care, just gets up and gets the fuck out. Believe me, I hate to repeat myself.”

  She scowls but finally does what she's told.

  "You're such an asshole.” she yells before making her grand exit.

  They are all the same. Whores. They all have it coming and they are still wondering why.

  I grab the bottle next to me and I notice it is empty. Shit. I need more booze as I am nowhere near wasted. And wasted is exactly how I want to be. At least then I could pass out without having those nightmares .I try to stand up but I can't seem to distinguish right from left.

  "Travis!" I yell and a massive, tattooed guy enters the room. Travis is an old high school friend. He has been on my side all these years, and when I think what a nuisance I must have been I pity him. I pity him for having a friend like me. His appearance is quite a complex for him. He looks menacing and mean; a guy not to be trifled with, but inside he is a loyal and kind guy.

  "Bring me another" I slur before sliding down to the floor.

  He looks at me for a second but does as he's told and in a few minutes he's at my side handing me another bottle. I take a swig and spit it.

  "What the fuck!" You put water in it." I say accusingly and he just shrugs.

  "Do you think I enjoy seeing you here like this every night? This is messed up bro."

  I feel dizzy and I don't trust my judgment any longer.

  "Just leave." Leave before I say or do something that I will regret, I mentally add.

  He heads for the door but stops and looks back at me

  "You crashing at the club?”

  I nod and I am again left alone.

  Sometime later sleeps claims me and it's like a sick prison, a slideshow of memories deriding me.

  I hear her laughter again louder at first and eventually fading into the background.

  "I love you so much Aiden." her soft, sweet voice making my insides tremble.

  The next thing I know I am in the same room in which my whole world came crashing down on me, three years ago.

  "Sir, I am deeply sorry." the P.I had hired to find her says solemnly

  “You didn’t find her? How much more time do you need?”

  "Sir ...she's dead.”

  I stare at him for a moment, thinking I hadn't heard correctly but he continues.

  "She died earlier this year. I deeply apologize for being the one to deliver this.”

  He doesn't get to finish as I sink down into the chair, tears threatening to make their way out.

  “How?" I whisper

  "Car accident.” According to the police report she was trying to elope with her boyfriend.”

  Boyfriend. You were nothing. My inner voice silently adds .Lies. Lies. Lies. The word resounds in my head. Worthless. Junkie.

  My mother materializes in front of me.

  "Mama Loves you baby boy." she says as she walks away, towards the light.

  I shot upright, drenched in sweat and with one hell of a headache. Yet another day to go through the motions. I have been this way for the past three years, when my hope died with the one I loved most in the world. Her betrayal hurt like hell, but her death messed something inside me. Alice was my ray in this fucked up world. She was my salvation. My everything. Believe me I have tried to end this shit of a life. But fate always finds a way to laugh in my face. Last fall I was this close to death given to a serious beating but those fuckards of doctors just found the way to make me breath again. I had known that by going between two feuding gangs could only mean one thing, and I embraced it wholeheartedly. I am not a pussy. I just don't have any reason to live for. I have been taken to the hospital for an overdose twice so far, and every time I came back. Of course, the doctors did everything in their power, following my father's orders, after all a senator couldn't afford to have his only kids die from drugs. Appearances. As if I give a damn about him and his plastic little world of perfection. Eventually I resigned myself to living. I resuscitated my business and it has been quite thriving. My time usually is split in two. College, managing my affairs and alcohol and women. At some point I realized that I could only go through life numbing my feelings with booze and whores . And those required money and considering that my father had pretty much cut me off I had to fall back on something. You may think I am a heartless bastard , and that I am , I don't deny it ,but I have given my heart twice and once they left , they left with it . I am just empty. Hollow.

  Chapter 1

  I wake up in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat. I haven't had that dream in such a long time. And time has turned it into a nightmare. I can still conjure his face in my mind, and his voice, the way he could make me fall in love with him a thousand times just with a few words. There had never been anyone to understand me the way he did. But that was...then. It's already been almost five years. I know I should already move on, and to a certain degree I have. He's just a beautiful memory now. A sad, yet beautiful memory.

  "Again?" I hear Sarah's sleepy voice and I look to find her standing by my bed.

  "You told me they had ended last summer.”

  "I...I don't know why “tears start forming in my eyes. “I thought so too ..."

  "Oh honey…” she says as she hugs me gently. Sarah has been my best friend since coming here to college and I had confided in her of him. She's tried every time to set me up with different guys just to keep my mind off him, considering that at that time I was quite the emotional wreck.

  "Hush, hush, stop crying, I have the perfect plan to get your mind off things.” she smiles at me. Her plans of course included almost always booze and guys. That made me smiles a little. "And what would that be? “A friend of my brother's is hosting a party and Brad said I should bring some girlfriends and since it's just you.... "God no, Sarah's brother Brad was alright, don't get me wrong, he was actually very nice and outgoing, but they belong to a totally different crowd. Their father is some hot shot lawyer that earns more in a year than some do in a lifetime. They are not spoiled but their friends...let's just say that I don’t wish to see Barbie nor Ken in real life.

  "Sarah... I can’t, you know that I don’t really like his friends... "

  "Come on Kate, I promise you its going to be alright. Besides, don't worry, it is not Andrew here that we are talking about, I don't even think he will come. It's the birthday of one of Brad's team mates. I can't really recall his name now but a change of scenery will do you good.”

  I am prepared to refuse her but she's pouting. How can anyone refuse her when she's pouting?

  "Fine! But don't you dare call Gregory! Promise me!"

  "Kate, the boy is smitten, you should give him a chance...fine, I won't call him!” I begin to drift back to sleep and I think I hear Sarah whispering a thank you.

  The next few days pass in a haze. I don't dream about him again and everything seems to return to normal. But the more I dwell in it, the more Idealize have never done everything to actually change myself. The party is in two days. I sh
ould go shopping and maybe get a haircut. He is not going to control my life any longer. Unfortunately Sarah can't accompany me so I am forced to go to the mall alone. After walking for about thirty minutes I spot a hair salon and a crazy thought crosses my mind. I enter the salon and give the hairstylist the indications and after about three and a half hours I am walking out, arm in arm with my new blue haired self. Yes, that is correct, and I have to say that I love the color. It takes me a few more hours to decide on a dress, the perfect dress actually. It is a gorgeous silver strapless dress that hugs my every curve. Seriously, this is really my lucky day, or let’s just says the day that marks me discovery. I mean why not? I am a twenty year old female that has never done anything in the least daring or scandalous. Like Sarah said, a change of scenery would do me perfect

  Chapter 2

  There was only darkness and I succumbed to it. The tears wouldn't stop falling and I didn't want them to stop. It reminded me of what I had and what I lost. An outstretched hand appears and hands me a tissue. I look up, my vision clouded, but I can still make out the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen, owned by an equally beautiful face.

  “You a cry baby or what?" He says and gives me a warm smile. I take the tissue and throw it away, grumpily answering him:

  "It's none of your business”. He holds my gaze for a moment and then he throws his head back and starts laughing. A deep, rich sound that leaves me wide eyed. What is wrong with him?

  "You are even cuter when you are angry” He takes a seat next to me and from his pocket he takes out another tissue. Before I can even react he starts wiping away my tears. I am still in shock and I just watch him. When he is done he looks me seriously in the eyes and says.

  "You should never cry for a guy. They are not worth it if they make pretty girls like you cry “What? Wait. How did this happen? A guy? I am crying for a guy? Before I can process everything he is already getting up to leave.

  "I...." I stammer "my father, he died recently” I blurt out. I can't believe I am sharing something so personal with a stranger, but somehow I just could not have him believing I was crying for a guy. He turns his head in my direction and now he's looking at me with such sad eyes.

  "I know I should say 'I'm sorry ' but probably you are already sick of hearing it, right?” I manage a nod and he pats my head gently

  "Hang in there kiddo, life may not be always pink but nevertheless it's a true gift and you should not let things like death bring you down " He looks up at the sky, almost lost in his own thoughts and continues.

  “Treasure every moment “, then he walks away.

  ***

  "Wow!" Sarah says, wide eyed as she takes in my new look.

  "Katy sweetheart, you look stunning. I swear I could have never thought that the blue color would suit someone as well as it suits you. And the dress, it's totally hot. "

  "Thanks Sarah, I needed a change ..."

  "Well, that sure is a hell of a change. I am sure you will get your number of suitors in no time “she says and she winks at me. I blush and start taking the dress off. We spend the evening eating unhealthy food and watching soap operas. My mood had improved considerably. Finally the "big day” or how Sarah had called it “my reintroduction into society " has arrived. Tell you the truth I was a bit nervous and the nervousness reached quite a high level when I saw that we were to go in a limo. I mean what the hell? Was this a movie premiere and I did not know? Brad and another guy stepped out of it and came before us.

  "Aren't I lucky to escort such beautiful girls? “Brad says and winks at us. I blush instantly.

  "This is Thomas, ladies, and he is a good friend of mine." He gestured to the guy next to him. He was tall, almost as tall as Brad and I believe he has Latino heritage as his skin is a beautiful milk chocolate color. He is quite good looking, but unfortunately he does not appeal to me in that way. We shake hands and it seems that he has had a totally opposite effect on Sarah as she is grinning from ear to ear. We make our way to the limo and Sarah whispers to me

  "He's hot!" I smile and shake my head. Our destinations seems to be a beautiful mansion, obviously the owners are more than loaded. The architecture is kind of a gothic one, which I totally love.

  "Aiden lives alone here; he's redecorated the house by himself. Isn't it amazing? “He asks, seeing me admiring the place.

  "By himself?" I ask “How old is he?”

  "We are the same age, twenty one but I swear the man seems forty sometimes. He is quite dense but he's had quite a full plate growing up so I don't blame him. You two should stay away from him though, he's quite the ladies’ man and he does not do relationships. I am only telling you because I don't want to see you hurt."

  "God, Brad, believe me there is no need in telling us. I can very well take care of myself, you know me and besides, I am more than confident that Kate won't jump with him in bed anytime soon, right Kate?"

  "Yeah , of course " I was kind of lost in thought , but of course , I would be the last person on earth to have a one night stand , I just don't have it in me I guess . We get out of the car and head for the front door.

  "By the way, Kate?” Brad says as he eyes head to toe

  “That blue rocks on you." A small smile tugs at the corner of my mouth

  "Why, thank you Brad." He offers me his arm and we enter.

  The interior is just as breathtaking as the exterior. I feel like I am in a museum. Everything is fancy and expensive of course, but in a way it has an air of authenticity. And, surprisingly enough, even though it looks just like a museum, somehow it's cozy and makes you feel...at home. Suddenly I am really curious about meeting the owner.

  Chapter 3

  The atmosphere is a little bit more select than your average collage parties, but some things never change, namely the hooking up and the getting high. I have already spotted about two couples (or not) in full make out mode on a couch and in the hallway and one couple ascending the stairs. Brad leads us towards the living room and introduces us to some of his friends from college. At least, until now there was no plastic Barbie, I can barely stand those. And as if on cue, a blonde, stunning girl comes towards us, towards Brad to be more precise. She frowns a bit when she sees me at his arm and in a really annoying voice she greets him

  "Brad, sweetie, how are you?" She kisses both of his cheeks and gives me a deadly stare.

  "Hey Brianna" he says and she continues

  "Who are your…friends?" What the hell is wrong with her?

  "Oh Brianna here is my sister Sarah and her friend Kate. Girls this is ...“he stammers and it's kind of cute, except the little bitch is pissed and completes the sentence for him

  "Girlfriend, nice to meet you” Yeah sure it is. After another scowl from the precious little Barbie excuse myself to get something to drink. I make my way through the crowd and I bump into a hard chest. I look up and oh God! Gregory!

  "Hum...hi Gregory" He studies me for a second

  "Kate? Wow, this is really you? I mean of course it is really you, what I wanted to say is that, hum .., you look stunning. Blue suits you “He looks kind of cute, not finding his words and I giggle.

  "Thank you”

  "You are welcome, well you do look like a princess from another planet" Now I really laugh

  "Thanks again, I guess”

  "Hum...Can I get you something to drink?"

  "Sure...” He takes my hand and leads me towards the bar. Gregory is such a sweet guy but I can't see him as anything more than a good friend, and the main reason for avoiding him all the time is that every nice word or gesture that I make, he takes it as an encouragement and I hate to lead him on.

  "What do you want?” he asks me.

  "Whisky.”

  He gives me a weird look but complies. In the meanwhile I spot yet another couple right in front of me. Ahh they should really get a room. The guy looks kind of hot though He's got thick ,black hair ,not too long but also not short , and it curls around the edges .Gregory hands me my drink and at th
e same moment the guy raises his head and our eyes meet . It's like I am being caught in a maze. At every turn those beautiful blue eyes keep on haunting me. And it seems that now they have materialized. I can't breathe, I feel like I am suffocating. My heart is beating like mad and I keep on staring into those crystal eyes that represent my nightmares. He winks at me and continues to kiss his girlfriend. I think I am going to be sick. I down my whole glass in one gulp, reveling in the burning sensation that has assaulted my throat.

  "Refill" I tell Gregory.

  "You shouldn't..." I cut him off

  "I am going to be just fine, I am used to drinking even more so a refill please " once the words are out a wave of nostalgia hits me again. I used to drink with my dad...but he's dead....He hands me another glass and I down it as well.

  "Let's dance!" I say, dragging him with me. I can still see him and he can still see me. I know he watches me from the corner of his eye, so I do the first thing that crosses my mind. I pull Gregory closer, so that our bodies are aligned and I kiss him hard. I can tell he is surprised, but also that he is elated.

  ***

  “I love you, Alice, I love you so much" he whispers, his lips still on mine.

  "I love you too, more than you could ever know, and thank you, thank you for everything" I say as tears start forming into my eyes.

  "Hush, don't cry princess. It's not our end , I promise you I will come back for you , once I have all my shit back together I am coming back , because you are my home " his words make me cry even more

  "Please baby doesn’t cry, I hate it when you cry, it hurts to see you like this." I raise my hand to my face to wipe away my tears but he stops me

  "Let me." and he starts kissing my eyes, slowly making his way across my cheek

  "I love you so much.” I tell him

  "I know baby, just promise me one thing” he says.

  "Anything. “I whisper

  "Promise me you will wait for me, that there won't be anyone else” I smile