Sharon Karaa - A Familiar Problem (Northern Witches #2) Read online

  He took another sexy drink of his coffee. “I’ve still got friends, Natalia. Some of those guards used to work for me. I’ve made arrangements.”

  I choked on my own drink. Friends? In Hell? “And you trust these demons?”

  He put his cup down, looking at me as though I’d grown two heads.

  “Nats, didn’t you have any friends in Hell?”

  “It’s Hell, Abs, we’re not there to make friends,” I snapped. Had I entered some strange sort of parallel universe or something?

  He sat back in his chair and regarded me, a look of understanding dawning on his face. I found myself blushing. Me. A demon. What the hell?

  Embarrassed, I pushed my chair back and stood up, instantly transforming into my leathers.

  “Are you going to sit there all day or are we going to get cracking?”

  He pushed himself up and smiled. “Got any salt?”

  We landed in semi-darkness, right outside the prison and on the wrong side of the gates. Not a good omen, that’s for sure.

  I craned my neck, looking up at the twenty foot metal posts with my hands on my hips.

  “If you think I’m climbing up there, you can think again,” I whispered, as Abaddon came up behind me.

  “You don’t need to sugar lips, there’s a gate further down, come on.”

  He all but dragged me a hundred yards further down to an iron gate, secured with the thickest and longest chain I’d ever seen and fastened with a heavy, rusty looking padlock. As we approached, the chain lifted its padlock and looked at Abaddon. I did a double take and rubbed my eyes. The chain had morphed into a python so large it wouldn’t even have to dislocate its jaw to swallow me whole.

  “You’re late” it said, eyeballing Abaddon maliciously.

  “Sorry mate, I had trouble getting the little lady out of bed.” Abaddon winked at me. I wanted to pin him against the railings and put that chain to good use. I refrained. Wonders will never cease.

  The snake turned its head slightly and looked at me, smiling. Or as near to a smile as a snake could manage. It wasn’t pretty.

  “I can see how that could happen,” it replied, uncoiling itself from the bars and slithering to the ground.

  I kicked Abaddon in the shin, just for the hell of it and he screamed like a girl. Glaring at me and rubbing his heel, Abaddon turned and swung the gate in over, holding it open for me as though he were some kind of gentleman. I rolled my eyes and stepped through as his hand landed on my arse, almost knocking me flying.

  The snake slithered in behind us then morphed again, this time into a seven foot demon. He was overweight. And he had zits. Sweat marks peeped through the armpits of his grey uniform jacket and his brass buttons hadn’t seen the swipe of a rag in a long time. He leered at me, drool escaping the side of his mouth and getting caught up in whatever he’d got stuck in his beard. It looked like a piece of fried egg.

  “Any time you want to ditch this lousy son of a bitch and get with a real man, you let me know” he said, winking in what I’m pretty sure he thought was a sexy way. It didn’t work well with his cataracts.

  Before I could reply, he turned his back, his hands like shovels, pushing the gate back until it locked into place and morphed back into full length iron bars as though the gate had never been there in the first place. This place reeked of magic, and not the good kind; the good kind being the kind that turned water into beer or resulted in a goal for your favourite team (usually being the team with the lease supporters; it caused more problems that way). No, this place reeked of the kind of magic that woke you up in the dead of night, in a cold sweat with the fear of clammy hands around your throat. I shuddered. Abaddon was instantly beside me, touching my arm, his eyes flashing red as a warning.

  “Knock it off, Levethian, she’s spoken for.”

  I glared at him. I didn’t need his protection. Then a warm tingle settled in my stomach. I wondered if I was getting sick. Demons don’t get sick but perhaps this being infected by humanity was true.

  “No disrespect intended, Abaddon, it’s just my way. See a pretty demon, hit on it. Can’t be helped, I’m afraid.”

  He shuffled in front of us, leading us towards the towering building that housed the damned souls of some of the most evil men and women in Hell. And earth. Well, with the exception of London.

  Quick as a flash, Abaddon had him by the lapels and dragging him down to glare into his greasy face. Levethian was a few inches taller but I had no doubt that Abaddon could take him, chew him up and spit him out without breaking a sweat.

  “Help it,” he said, eyes flashing red.

  Levethian chuckled. “You got it bad, Abaddon?”

  Abaddon dropped his hands, freeing his captive and took a step back, saying nothing. Levethian chuckled again then turned and continued on towards the building.

  Two heavy oak doors laced with iron bars, swung open as we approached, leading to a dark corridor with the highest ceilings I’d ever seen. The walls were tiled white ceramic and if I hadn’t known different, I would have thought we were in a hospital, so strong was the smell of cleaning products. It didn’t hide the cloying, coppery smell of blood, so thick you could almost taste it.

  My heels clipped on the tiles and echoed down the hallway as we advanced towards another set of doors which again, opened on our approach.

  “This is too easy,” I whispered suspiciously to Abaddon. “Where are all the guards?”

  “They’re watching Coronation Street. They want to find out who murdered Tina McIntyre,” Levethian responded. “You’ve got about twenty minutes until it finishes, so get a move on.”

  I looked at Abaddon in disbelief and he winked at me. I wish he would stop doing that, it made it very hard to concentrate and I needed to be focussed in this hell hole.

  We entered yet another long corridor lined with doors on both sides and Levethian walked to the third door on the left, pulling a hefty bunch of keys from a chain on his belt. Keys? Are you kidding me?

  Metal hit metal and after a heavy clunk, Levethian swung the door open, stepping to the side to allow us access.

  “Twenty minutes, Abaddon, then I can’t help you.” He glared at Abaddon with milky eyes then closed the door and I heard the key turn again, locking us in.

  Footsteps echoed back down the corridor and we turned to see Cuthbert Nicholson, sitting at a desk, chewing the end of his pen with a seriously worried expression on his face. He didn’t even look up as he suddenly experienced his Eureka moment and started to scribble furiously on the piece of paper in front of him.

  I walked further in to the room and realised he was attempting to complete the Times crossword. He was staring at the page as though his life depended on it when suddenly he screamed and grabbed his bare foot, missing all of its toenails and bleeding profusely. The paper in front of him disappeared and a new, pristine, copy appeared in its place. Welcome to Hell, where new and unusual forms of torture were born every day. Or borne even.

  Abaddon walked towards him and, eventually, he looked up. He didn’t have the sense to be afraid.

  Any chance you know the answer to three down?” he asked, lifting the paper to show him the clue.

  In a blur of motion, Abaddon leapt forward and grabbed Nicholson by the front of his filthy shirt, lifting him off the floor and slamming him against the wall.

  “Do you know who I am?” he asked, his face inches from the snivelling wreck of Nicholson’s nose.

  “I’ve never seen you before in my life,” cried Nicholson, his eyes bulging in fright. Sensible man after all.

  Abaddon took half a step back. I assumed it was because of Nicholson’s breath since I could smell it from where I stood, some three feet further back. It smelled like rotting corpses.

  “I am the demon you tried to use to kill Lauren Rutherford,” Abaddon said, deathly calm. “And I want to know why!”

  Nicholson went white. Then he laughed.

  “Are you joking? I’m in hell, what can you do to me tha
t they haven’t done already?”

  Abaddon glared at him. “Have they introduced you to the fiery pits yet?”

  “Been there last week,” Nicholson smirked. I was revising my opinion at least once a minute. He obviously didn’t have the sense he was born with.

  Abaddon tightened his grip, his eyes burning red again. “How about the piranha pool?”

  Nicholson lifted up his left hand to show the three missing fingers.

  Zerachiel’s eyes returned to black and he paused for a moment, contemplating. “I can move your mother in law in here to bunk with you.”

  “I like my mother in law.” Nicholson smirked again and I felt my blood boil.

  I stepped in, putting my hand on Abaddon’s shoulder. He turned to look at me and I gave him the look; the one that says ‘leave this to the experts.’

  I got as close to Nicholson as his putrid breath would allow.

  “I can make you give birth, through your penis.”

  I looked at Nicholson. His eyes were like saucers but he held his ground.

  “It will be a forceps delivery” I said, a slight smile curving on my lips as I folded my arms and watched his chin start to wobble.

  “Conjoined twins” I added for good measure.

  Liquid pooled on the floor at his feet but he lifted his chin defiantly. I was going to have to take this up a notch.

  I swelled his stomach to the point where he looked like he was about to give birth to a baby elephant then gave him a little contraction, just to jolly things along. He doubled over in agony, beads of sweat popping up on his greasy brow as he screamed, clutching his baby bump.

  “Her name is Sarah Bulmer, that’s all I know! I swear it!”

  “Who is she?” Abaddon demanded. Nicholson looked at him blankly and I gave him another contraction, this one driving him to the floor where he collapsed in a heap.

  “Wow, less than a minute apart, you must be almost ready to pop,” I smiled gleefully, a pair of forceps appearing in my hands and I opened and closed them like a pair of scissors.

  He started to cry.

  Abaddon hunkered down on the floor beside him. “Tell us what we want to know and this can all be over. Who introduced you to Sarah? How was she involved in this?”

  “Shevels brought her in to help us. She said she could guarantee a victory and an end to the curse. I swear to you, that’s all I know! She made all the arrangements and told us where to be. All we had to do was get you to stay still long enough for the spell to be cast. I swear that was the one and only time I’d even laid eyes on her!”

  Abaddon’s eyes narrowed. “Who cast the spell?”

  “Sarah!”

  “What does she look like?”

  “Brown hair, brown eyes, I dunno, normal like!”

  “And you say you’d never met her before that day?”

  “I swear on my li…my death!”

  Abaddon looked at me then sighed as another contraction hit Nicholson. I waited for it to pass. Beads of sweat had formed on his forehead and drool dripped from his chin as he screamed in agony. Eventually, the contraction tapered off and a look of relief came over him.

  “There now, that wasn’t so bad now, was it?” I patted him on the arm and turned to Abaddon.

  “Are we done here?”

  Abaddon looked at the heavily pregnant Nicholson and nodded his head.

  “Where to now?” I asked him.

  “We need to pay a visit to Shevels but we still can’t transport so its home for now. At least until I can make arrangements.”

  Abaddon wrapped his arms around me and started to chant to take us back through the portal.

  Nicholson’s eyes almost popped out of his head. “Wait! Aren’t you forgetting something?”

  I looked at him blankly then realisation dawned on me.

  “Oh yes, silly me!” I said and handed him the forceps.

  We exited the portal directly in to Lauren’s kitchen, Abaddon’s arms still wrapped tightly around me. He didn’t need to hold me on the journey back up and yet I hadn’t challenged him on it. I didn’t want to worry about what that actually meant right now. Right now, we had other things on our mind.

  Abaddon slumped down in the chair and looked at me, grinning.

  “You are amazing, do you know that? How in hell did you think that one up?”

  I smiled, secretly thrilled at his praise. This was, after all, one of the most powerful demons in Hell.

  “It’s a gift.” I took the seat opposite him.

  “Do you know who she is?” I asked him.

  “Haven’t a clue.” He pulled his fingers through his hair and sighed.

  “You’re sure? I asked, raising an eyebrow and looking at him suspiciously.

  “I wouldn’t lie to you, Natalia” he said, staring at me intently. Yes, right, I thought. I believe that like I believed that catholic priests didn’t nip at the sacramental wine.

  “She couldn’t be someone you had a relationship with and she wants revenge for you stomping on her heart?”

  He looked like he was about to explode. “Absolutely not.” He glared at me across the table.

  “She may have disguised herself, she might be a busty blonde, that seems to be your type, doesn’t it?”

  I was winding him up but a little part of me that I didn’t want to acknowledge wanted to know just what kind of a man-whore I was actually dealing with here.

  “Oh, absolutely! The bustier the better! Maybe you’re right! Maybe it is one of my conquests! Or perhaps it’s one of my spawn, there must be hundreds of them out there! After all, I’m a demon, which obviously means I put it about a bit!” He glared at me.

  No one has ever accused me of having the sense I was born with so I gave him the final push.

  “Or maybe it’s one of Lilith’s bitches, seeking revenge because you shagged her girlfriend?”

  His eyes turned into pools of molten lava and in a second, he was up, out of his chair and pulling me to him, his lips finding mine in a punishing kiss. A thrill ran through me as his tongue found its way into my mouth. I gave in to my demon and matched his ferocity, pulling him to me, allowing my hand to travel beneath his sweater and touch his glorious flesh. He groaned as I made contact and pulled up my top, his hands cupping my breasts as his thumbs roughly brushed across my swollen nipples. I almost exploded on him then and there and my hands went to the front of his jeans, working frantically to pop the button and free his erection. I finally managed to release him and captured him in my hands. I said a little prayer of thanks as I stretched my fingers around the massive girth and felt his body shudder. In a second, he had ripped the leather trousers from my body, buttons and seams tearing apart like paper in his powerful hands. He cupped my sex with one hand, brushing my underwear aside as a finger inserted itself inside me with practised ease.

  Then the doorbell went.

  Abaddon pushed me away from him and ran a hand through his hair. His brown eyes heavy with desire, he opened his mouth to say something then changed his mind.

  “I’ll see you later, go answer your door,” and with that, he disappeared, leaving me winded, very horny and very confused. And completely pissed at whatever sorry ass was standing at the door.

  8 - Shop till you drop

  Selina breezed in with a big smile on her face. I’d dressed in new clothes and disappeared the torn shreds of those I’d been wearing earlier. I didn’t want to spend the next half hour having a girly chat about how the sexy demon had rejected me not once but twice.

  “Glad to see you’re up already. Do you fancy coming in to town for a coffee and a little bit of shopping?”

  I looked at her as though she had two heads. She knows I hate shopping, unless it’s the online kind where you don’t have to stand in a queue. I didn't know what she was up to but I intended to find out.

  “What brought this on?” I asked as I followed her in to the kitchen and watched her take a bottle of water from the fridge.

  She smiled sh
eepishly. “Agnes wants you to get out more,” she replied. “But honestly, Natalia, I haven’t spent much time with you lately and I find myself in the peculiar situation of missing your company. Come on, it’ll be fun,” she said, taking a swig from the bottle.

  I thought about it. I could sit here brooding over all of my problems or I could forget about it for a couple of hours.

  “I’ll get my coat,” I said, heading for the hall cupboard.

  “You won’t need it; it’s a lovely day out there!” Selina shouted after me. I groaned. Just my sodding luck.

  Selina manoeuvred the car expertly in to the only remaining empty parking bay on Grey Street. It was still early morning but already the town was bustling with activity.

  “Do you want me to ‘fix’ the machine?” I asked, turning to her.

  Selina stared at me blankly. I nodded towards the Pay and Display machine and her eyes widened in understanding.

  “Absolutely not,” she said, crossly, getting out and reaching for her purse. I shrugged my shoulders. It was her money, if she wanted to throw it away that was her business.

  I climbed out of the car and leaned against the door as she dutifully paid her fee for the two hour stay. As I waited, a young woman with a child walked towards me. The woman was talking animatedly into her mobile phone and the little boy was scowling unhappily as they walked. I smiled pleasantly at the child but something was obviously upsetting him and he just glared at me. I had no idea what his problem was so I glared back. He stuck his tongue out so I did the same. He mouthed a word at me a kid his age shouldn’t even know.

  “Bitch!”

  I lifted the curb stone a few strategic millimetres, causing him to trip and fall. He wailed like a banshee and the woman bent down to pull him roughly to his feet.

  "For Christ's sake, Jake, watch where you're going! And stop whinging or I'll give you something to whinge about. Big boys don't cry!"

  Obviously not your caring, sympathetic type, I thought, feeling a little sorry for the kid as he tried valiantly to control his emotions, his little chin wobbling with the effort to keep his tears in. No wonder men were so fucked up. The woman walked past me, dragging little Jake with her and picked up her conversation on the mobile.