Stephanie Thomas - Lucidity Read online

  “It’s really not a big deal, I promise. I just … ” I give the dresses another wary look. “I’m not so sure I’m up for those. I don’t wear dresses very often, you see … just my robe and a jump suit for the days when we have the Training Games—” I stop myself, realizing that I’ll never have to take part in Training Games ever again if I didn’t want to. Now, I’m the Keeper, and it’s my job to make sure everyone else is training. But training for what now that the battle between the Dreamcatchers and the Seers is over? Or, is it really over at all?

  Irene ducks her head down in shame. “I’m sorry, Keeper Beatrice.” Admonished, the young woman picks a dress from the rack and holds it out for me to see. “They are very beautiful though, aren’t they? You’ll look much like the queen in these.”

  The very thought is unsettling. I don’t want to look like the queen. I want to look as different from her as I possibly can so that no one confuses me with the impossible woman, not that we could be easily confused. With my midnight black hair compared to her almost violet-blond tresses? No, a dress wasn’t going to make us any more alike.

  “May I ask you some questions?” I ask as Irene puts the dress aside, then taps on my arms, signaling for me to hold them out by my sides. Like a busy little bee hovering around a flower, she buzzes around me taking my measurements.

  “Sure!” she squeaks and goes right back to her measuring.

  “You are both Citizens, right?”

  Irene stops her measuring and casts a look to Jamie, who nods her head. “We are, Keeper Beatrice.”

  I don’t really need to ask the question to know. The Citizens of Aura look much different than the Dreamcatchers, whose features are mostly light, with startling blue eyes that can’t go unnoticed. The Citizens, on the other hand, have dark features, with brown or black hair and dark, muddy-brown eyes. Occasionally, back in the City, one could find a Citizen with light hair and dark eyes, but they weren’t very common.

  “And there’s a plague that is spreading among the Citizens here, is there not?” I put my arms down when Irene is done taking my measurements. Just as soon as she’s out of the way, Jamie steps forward with the amethyst-purple dress in her arms, which she lays out on the rose pink-covered bed.

  Mentioning the plague brings them both to a stop. Jamie lowers her eyes, which begin to fill with tears, and I immediately regret asking about such a touchy subject. “There is, Keeper. It’s the most horrible plague. No one has heard anything of it, and the rumor was that you’d help us get rid of it somehow.”

  “The rumor?” Brushing my hand over the light fabric of the dress, I think through this, and realize that I’ve suddenly become their savior, just like I had for the Seers and Citizens back in the City … before the invasion. Before I left them behind. “Please remember that rumors … well … they are just that, rumors. I can’t promise you I can do anything. I can’t promise the answers will be shown to me.”

  Tears finally fall from the corners of Jamie’s eyes and she sniffles with a nod, her nose and cheeks turning red from being upset. “Yes, we understand, Keeper Beatrice. But, it is still okay for us to hope.” She slips the buttons loose that run down the back of the dress in a straight line. Picking it up off the bed, she gathers it up by the waist and holds it by my face. “Arms up.”

  Irene picks up Jamie’s story where she left off, watching as her companion pulls the dress down over my head. I slip my hands through the short sleeves and lift my chin up over the high collar with the ornate, silver button. “The Citizens live in the Camp just outside Aura’s walls. The plague has spread so quickly that it’s nearly wiped out the whole community. The Breeding tents have been quiet since no new babies are being born. Or, if they are born, they don’t live for very long. Family dwellings have been suffering, and sometimes whole units are wiped out in just a matter of days.”

  Jamie chokes back a sob and moves behind me to button the dress up. Her fingers tremble against my back, and I wait for Irene to explain the young woman’s reaction.

  “Jamie just found out a week ago that her whole family unit had … well … they died in the plague,” Irene explains, moving around me to help her fellow servant with the buttoning.

  “All of them. Even my little brother, and his fifth birthday was just a couple of weeks away.” Jamie sniffles and steps away from the dress when it’s fastened. They both come back around to stand in front of me, and for the first time, I look at Jamie now that I know the burden that she’s been carrying around with her. I wish there was something I could do to ease her pain, but I know there’s nothing that anyone can do to make her feel better. I don’t understand the bond that others have with families, since I’ve never had one my own, but I do understand what it feels like to lose someone, and memories of Connie and Mae’s pretty smiles flash through my mind.

  “I am sorry to hear that, Jamie. It must be very difficult for you to keep working here when you know that Citizens are suffering elsewhere.” For a moment, I think about Gabe suffering back home while I’m being pampered in some elaborate boudoir that doesn’t even belong to me.

  I follow Jamie over to a small bench-like chair that is situated in front of a vanity table with an oval mirror. Sitting before the mirror, I watch through the reflection as they take out hair-dressing supplies, including brushes, combs, fancy hairpins, pomades, and other materials.

  “We hear stories about the plague through the palace. About what happens when someone comes down with it … ” Jamie bites on her lip, unable to go on.

  “They get very sick,” Irene picks up, handing some oil over to Jamie, who starts to brush her fingers through my hair, preparing it for whatever it is they are about to do with the long, black tresses. “First, they get a fever … and then, they start to moan and scream for relief from the pain. Then, the blood comes.” She casts a glance at Jamie as she continues to share the details. “Through the nose and the eyes. And then they start to cough it up. Some say that once the blood comes, there’s nothing that can be done, since the body inside has already started to come apart.”

  “And once the blood comes, it only takes a few hours for them to die. But it’s a long, agonizing few hours of immense pain. Only a few have come back from the fever, but no one has come back from the blood.” Jamie puts a hot iron aside and wipes her nose with a handkerchief that she pulls out of a hidden pocket in her dress. “It only took a day for my whole family to die. One day they were fine, and the next day my mother came home with the fever and it was all over.”

  “You mentioned a Breeding tent? With babies? What is that?” I try to change the subject away from Jamie’s family, if only so she doesn’t have to think about them bleeding from their eyes and nose until there’s no more blood in them to be bled.

  “The Dreamcatchers have set up Birthing Tents, where women spend their whole fertile lives growing and giving birth to new Citizens or Dreamcatchers.” She pauses a moment and looks away from me. “Or Seers, but those children are disposed of just as soon as they open their pretty violet eyes.”

  This isn’t very surprising to me. In the City, much the same thing happens. If a child is born a Dreamcatcher, they are given to the Institution to dispose of. It is something else I wish to change, something that will have to wait until I get back home. At least I can have them sent to Aura to be raised, instead of killed on the spot in the City. Perhaps it is something to think about mentioning to Echo, to see if the opposite could be done here.

  But the thought of Birthing Tents is a little much for me. “So, that is all those women do?”

  “Yes. Most of the Citizens who are in family units have their own children as well. But to keep the population strong, we have Birthing Tents. The more Citizens we have, the more work can be done.” Jamie curls my hair and piles the ringlets up on top of my head. They are fastened with silver pins that are ornamented with tiny purple beads. With my hair out of my face, the raven wings tattooed around my eyes and down my cheeks are much more prominent, and
they make my still-glowing violet eyes seem even more radiant.

  It hits me what Jamie is getting at, though. The Citizens here are much more than a source of stability for the Dreamcatchers. “So, you are all servants to the Dreamcatchers?”

  Irene giggles, finding something that I’ve said to be amusing. “Servants? No, Keeper Beatrice, only a few of us are servants. All of us are slaves.”

  “Slaves?” I turn in my seat, nearly ruining my hair in the process. “Slaves?” I look at them both in turn.

  “Yes, Keeper.” Jamie urges me to face forward again. “We all have different jobs. Most of the Citizens are laborers. They work out in the fields to maintain the production of the crops. Some of us are servants, like Irene and me. Some are trainers, and others are merchants. There are mothers, and teachers, and all sorts of professions … but we all are bound to the Dreamcatchers. We are here to serve them.”

  Echo never told me that the Aurans used the Citizens as slaves. I’m coming to find out that Echo has been keeping much from me. The thought of the Citizens not being able to live their lives freely infuriates me, and I wave the both of them away so I can stand. “So you are telling me that you are all being made to live in the Settlements, which are now plagued with some deadly epidemic, and you are forced to work for the Dreamcatchers for the rest of your lives?”

  Jamie and Irene nod at the same time, the expressions on their faces revealing that this is the only life they’ve ever known, which means slavery has been in place in Aura for many years now.

  Irene reaches up to fix one more piece of my hair, then claps her hands together and smiles at her creation. “You look beautiful, Keeper Beatrice. Doesn’t she look so beautiful, Jamie?”

  Jamie, now without any tears, smiles as well. “She does. Are you ready for us to bring you to breakfast now, Keeper Beatrice? We would not wish to keep Prince Echo waiting for too long.” The two exchange a knowing look and Irene lifts a hand up to her mouth and giggles behind it.

  “No, we wouldn’t want to keep him waiting,” I mutter, not very pleased to have to face Echo again with all of this new information on my mind. There are a few more pieces of information I need to find out, though, and before we leave, I stop the two by the door. “Did you girls live in the Settlements? How did you come to work in the palace?”

  “Oh yes. Everyone is born and raised in the Settlements. Girls and boys are sent to different schools to learn. If you do exceptionally well and your behavior and demeanor is right, then you can come to work for the Dreamcatchers in their own homes as servants. Irene and I were picked from our class to work here since we both did so well together.” Jamie puts her hand on the knob of the door and turns to smile at Irene. “We’ve not been apart for most of our lives. I don’t know what I’d do without Irene, really. She’s like a sister to me.”

  Irene beams, obviously agreeing. “She’s the only family I have, to be honest. I’ve not seen my parents since I was a very little girl. They worked out in the fields, laboring. I was always left behind in school and would sometimes see them at night if they came to pick me up. It’s pretty common for children of laborers. The teachers often end up taking care of us.” Folding her hands in front of her with a happy grin, she smiles up at me. “I’d give anything to see them again, though. Just so they know I’m doing such a good job here in the palace. I don’t know if they ever believed in me, but sometimes I like to think that they had big aspirations for their only daughter. If only I could show them that I did it, that I got placed somewhere honorable.”

  “I’m sure they’d be very proud of you, Irene.” I put my hand on her shoulder and squeeze it. “You did a wonderful job making me look less like a Keeper and more like … well … one of them.”

  Irene takes the praise like a child being told she’s done something well, bright-eyed and all smiles. Jamie is more subtle and simply nods her head.

  I prepare to head back out into the palace, hoping that I won’t run into the queen again. With nothing but Gabe on my mind, I try to hold onto a memory of him that is much stronger than the after-effects of the Vision. Instead of nurses swarming around him in a panic, I keep the memory of Gabe on the rooftop, leaning in to kiss me.

  How I would give anything to be back on that rooftop. I wouldn’t have pulled away from Gabe had I known I might not ever see him again.

  Chapter 4

  Breakfast is tense at best, even if it is just me and Echo sitting at the long table that is meant to sit more than just two people. A holoscreen has been set up on the wall, and news stories from around Aura report the morning’s going-ons. Much of it is about the plague, and while the news reporters drone on about the body count for the day, Echo sighs and speaks loudly. “Off.” The holo instantaneously switches off, the screen turning black.

  I push eggs around my plate with the tip of my fork, not interested in eating. All I can think about is my Vision of Gabe, and the thoughts of Jamie’s family perishing in their family home, choking on their own blood.

  “What’s wrong?” Echo finally asks, and when I look at him, he is watching the way I shove my eggs around without eating them. “You aren’t eating.”

  “I don’t really have the stomach for eating right now, to be honest.” I let the fork drop to the side and fold my hands in the lap of my dress. “I can’t stop thinking about Gabe. Something is going to happen to him, and I’m not there to help him. I feel just awful for leaving him like I did.” Though I know Echo doesn’t want to hear about Gabe, I don’t care. Gabe is a big part of me, and I abandoned him for Echo; Echo’s going to hear it whether he wants to or not.

  “What happened in your Vision?” Echo surprises me when he asks about it, and I look back up at him. My head still throbs from the after-effects of having the Vision, but through the reflection of his eyes, I can see that mine are no longer glowing.

  I shake my head, my curled hair remaining tightly-pinned at the crown. I’m not used to the weight of it, and I realize for the first time how much hair I actually have. “I don’t know, exactly. The machines alarmed the nurses to come to the room, and they all swarmed around him before I could see what was going on.” With another shake of my head, I settle it in my hands, elbows propped up on the table. “Something’s gone horribly wrong, though. He’s not doing well, Echo.” After a pause, I admit to both myself and him, “I don’t think he’s going to pull through.”

  Echo picks up a white mug situated at the side of his plate, fingers curling around the middle. He sips whatever liquid is contained inside, a warm mixture of hearty spices and cloves. “Why do you think that?”

  “It’s just a feeling … a horrible feeling that is lingering somewhere inside of me. And when Seers get those feelings … ” I trail off, not wanting to know my own power and how it could play out in this case. I don’t want any feeling that I might lose Gabe forever, but it’s the one thought that I can’t get out of my mind. “I have to go back.”

  Echo puts the mug down. “You can’t go back yet.”

  “What?” I frown, pushing the plate of food away. “I’m not your prisoner, Echo. I came here on my own, and I’ll leave on my own, too.”

  The hesitant look he gives me tells me that I’m wrong. “My mother won’t let you leave. I begged and pleaded with her all of last night to let you return to the City … that there was nothing you can do for us here, but she’s not convinced.”

  I wait for him to continue, because if I speak right now, nothing pleasant will come out.

  “She said that you’ll leave when she’s ready for you to leave. She said that won’t be until after we are married.” Echo lowers his head, chin tucked down. Gazing into the mug, he mutters a quiet, “I’m sorry, Beatrice.”

  But, I am not accepting the apology. I slam my fist down on the table and everything on it jumps. “I am not your prisoner, do you hear me? One day, a Seer is going to see what is going on here, and they will come for me. Is that what you want? Another war?”

  “No, Beatrice.
I don’t want any of this. Why are you yelling at me? I didn’t choose for this to happen. I am not my mother.” Anger bleeds into Echo’s tone, and he begins to lose that patience that makes Echo who he is. After a moment, he reaches out and puts a hand over my clenched fist. “Maybe there is something I can do for Gabe.”

  I blink a few times, then frown again. “Don’t toy with me, Echo. Making this situation worse is not going to help anyone right now.”

  “I’m not ‘toying’ with you. I’m being serious. Let me ask around to see what I can do before I promise you anything.” Echo’s hand squeezes mine. “Beatrice, I don’t want to see you upset. It hurts me when you are hurting. This … this is not how anything was supposed to go.”

  I bite on my lower lip and fight the urge to push Echo away from me. But again, I’m drawn to him like night bugs to a light, and I can’t seem to avoid the way he pulls me in, grounds me. “Fine, figure it out. But until then, I want a favor from you.”

  Echo tilts his head and keeps his hand over my own. Wiggling his fingers into my tight fist, he intertwines them with my own. “Anything you want, Beatrice. I’ll try my best to get for you.”

  Casting a look to the doors of the dining room, I notice the Citizens who are keeping watch, ready to refill glasses and serve more food at the nod of the head. “You didn’t tell me that you kept the Citizens as slaves.”

  “It didn’t occur to me that it was something you wanted to know. It’s just a way of life for us.” Echo follows my gaze to the Citizens by the doors. “They serve us in much the same way that they serve you. The Seers present it differently, is all. You allow them to choose their jobs, and to breed their own children when they wish … and we choose to regulate it.” He lets go of my hand and takes up the mug once more. “In the end, though, they are used to breed more of our kind so that we don’t die out.”