SECRETS Vol. 5 Read online

  Em’s dark eyebrow lifts. He’s caught her attention. “What’d you have in mind?”

  CHAPTER 7

  My parents insist on checking in with me so frequently that my eye twitches. My cell rings and I pick it up. “I’m still fine, Ma. Cole’s taking good care of me.”

  “Thank God!” She blares into the phone. I pull it back from ear a little, so I don’t go deaf. Ma is one of those people who talks louder on a cell phone. She acts like it’s a tin can on a string and practically screams into the thing. “I’m having palpitations out here worrying about you. I can’t stand you living so far away. Come home, Anna. Your old room is—”

  I groan, “Ma, I’m fine. Really. And what happened could have happened anywhere. It’s not like the whole stalker thing was random. He went to your house for Chrissakes. He seemed sane to you, too.” I shouldn’t have said it. Reminding her of her conversation with Edward is like a kick to the gut. Apparently his obsession with me was worse than anyone thought. When the police starting questioning my family, my Ma recognized him.

  Ma’s voice shrinks back to a muffle. “I didn’t know, honey. I swear to God, I had no idea that he—”

  I cut her off, “That’s the point. Nobody knew and it could have happened anywhere. I’m safe here, Ma. I’ll be at Cole’s for a few more days and then I’ll move back in with Emma.”

  I don’t pull the phone back in time for the wave of tyrannical threats that spew from the tiny speaker. I open my mouth to respond, but Cole snatches the phone from my hand.

  He speaks over Ma, “Anna’s not going anywhere, Mrs. Lamore.” He says it so calmly, so certainly. I cock my head at him and feel extra stubborn. I don’t doubt for a second that he thinks I’m staying here indefinitely, but I feel like I need to get on with my life. It feels like I’m hiding here.

  I can still hear Ma yelling back, “She better not!”

  “I assure you, she is staying here with me, and if she insists on leaving, I will deposit her on your doorstep. She’s not going anywhere alone until Edward is behind bars. You have my word on that.” Edward’s out on bail, which is why things are kind of hard right now. No one wants to leave me alone so that he can take another go at me.

  Ma’s voice lowers and I can’t make out what she’s saying. Cole avoids my angry gaze until he hangs up.

  Cole sighs and hands me back my phone. “When were you going to tell me this marvelous plan?”

  I squirm on the couch and pull my knees into my chest. “Never.” I knew he wouldn’t like it.

  “I thought so.” He sits down next to me. “You can do anything you want, but it’s so far from smart that I can’t let you go back there. He’s out on bail. Edward could come after you again.”

  “He won’t” I say, staring straight ahead.

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Cole,” I take a breath, and look at him. “I don’t want to hide for the rest of my life. I want to get on with things and that means going back to normal.”

  “What if normal where here, with me?” His eyes are like twin gems, deep and clear. His voice is so sincere, so loving. Cole hasn’t mentioned the proposal since that night. Too many things happened.

  My lips tug into a small smile. I lean my head against his shoulder. “Tell me what that would look like. Things are changing right now. I don’t even know what tomorrow will be like and neither do you. It makes it hard to dream right now.”

  His arms wrap around me. “All I do is dream, right now. I dream about having you in my bed every night and seeing your beautiful face every morning. I dream about that lawsuit vanishing and having that part of my life over. I dream of being someone else’s son, with someone else’s name…” he strokes my hair as I listen to him. He breathes, “All I do is dream. I’m living in a fantasy world as long as you’re next to me. I can’t stand the thought of you leaving.”

  Silence fills the room. It’s not the awkward kind, it’s the peaceful kind. Cole wraps his arms around me tighter and holds me like that for a second. When he moves to release me and get up, I stop him. My fingers brush his forearms and press him against me. “Hope is important, Cole. Don’t feel bad about that. As for your name, have you thought about what you want to change it to?”

  He looks down at me and smiles. “Dude. You inspired me and I had to pick that one. People can call me Mr. Dude, the artist.”

  I laugh way too loud and smack his arm. “You can’t change your last name to Dude! Besides, if I said yes, that’d make me Mrs. Dude and I am so not doing that.”

  Cole grins. He sits and pulls me onto his lap. I turn to face him. His face is a breath from mine. “Oh? So you’ve thought about that a little bit, have you?”

  I nod. “A little bit.” My heart is pounding.

  “And that’s the only conclusion you’ve made?”

  “It’s a pretty good conclusion, right? There’s no way in hell people are going to call me Anna Dude.” I laugh and he smiles. It makes the corners of his eyes crinkle the way I Iove.

  “So, then what would you have me do?”

  “Pick a name that suits you, one that makes sense, and that you’d be happy to have.”

  “I’m not sure there is a name like that, Anna.”

  I want to smile, but I try to hide it. Taking his face in my hands, I say, “Lamore.” I swallow hard, letting the idea sink in. I take a breath. The feeling that I’m falling won’t hush. My stomach is in my throat. “I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but I know I want you in my life. I like my last name and what it stands for. Lamore’s think love is worth fighting for, that love is worth more than life, that—”

  He cuts me off with a kiss. Cole’s lips press hard against mine and he pulls away grinning. “I would love to take your name. Wedding or not.” He’s not certain that I’ve accepted his proposal.

  “Oh, there’ll be a wedding. I thought I had to know everything before I got married. I thought that my life was going to be laid out for me, that I’d go to college, graduate, get a job, get married, have kids—in that order—but it didn’t happen like that. I don’t have much, but what’s mine is yours…” he’s still quiet, watching me. I want to choke or run or jump out the window. I blabber on, adding, “If you still want me.”

  Cole’s eyes remain locked on mine. Without a word he stands up, with me on his lap. I scream as he chucks me in the air and catches me. He makes a very loud, happy, sound that almost sounds like a whoop, and whirls around with me in his arms, spinning in circles. We both laugh and scream. I cling to his chest and close my eyes, but it doesn’t stop the joy from bursting like fireworks inside of me. By the time he falls onto the couch, my face hurts from smiling so hard.

  I giggle, “Mr. Lamore, you’re going to be a handful.”

  “Likewise, Mrs. Lamore.”

  CHAPTER 8

  “Are you sure that you want me to run this, Cole? It kind of sets things in stone.”

  He nods, his dark hair falling forward as he moves. “It’s a warning shot. She needs to see it coming.”

  “Who?” I ask. “Sottero?”

  He nods. “She thinks that I won’t fight back because I never have, because I’ll lose my name. She knows my past and what that fucking name cost me.” He glances up at Emma. “Sorry—”

  “Don’t apologize to me. I swear like a sailor. Anna made me tone it down so I don’t offend her virgin ears.” Emma flips her dark curtain of silky hair over her shoulder. Somehow she always manages to have this sleek look that could make a Pantene model jealous.

  My face flames red, “My ears are not virgins.” I hiss, and then realize it sounds weird and grin rather stupidly.

  Cole’s eyebrow lifts, “We’ll need to discuss that later, Miss Lamore.” I smack his arm.

  We’re sitting in Emma’s apartment. It’s the first time that I’ve been back home since the day Edward attacked me. Em cleaned the place up. There’s no blood, but the smells and the way the light cuts through the blinds is identical. I’m glad Cole
didn’t want me to stay here. I think I wanted to do it to prove a point—that Edward didn’t break my brain, that I’m not afraid. The thing is, I am, but the fear has changed. I know who he is and what he was doing now. Instead of feeling the choking panic, I feel jittery and stressed. It’s like a nightmare that surfaces during daylight, even though it was scary when it happened, in the light of day the cold tentacles of fear are still laced around my throat. I shiver and Cole pulls me closer to him. We are sitting at the breakfast bar and Em is across from us on the couch.

  Emma ignores our banter. “Well, if you’re sure. Once the article is submitted, I can’t take it back. That’s all I’m saying.” She waits, watching Cole.

  “Do it.”

  The article is short. It mentions that famed photographer Cole Stevens is changing his last name. While it might seem like a public interest story to everyone else, to Sophia it’s a bomb. It’s telling her to drop her lawsuit, that Cole is going to fight back, and that she will lose. It’s a very gentle, tactful way to warn her to back down. He surprises me with that, especially since Sophia is so vicious.

  _____

  The article runs the day before the rescheduled hearing. I lift the paper and am surprised at the prominent location. The article is small, but Sottero v. Stevens has been in the papers on and off for a while now. I suppose that’s good, that there’s no way she’ll miss it.

  Cole sees me sitting on the couch with the paper. He has a cup of coffee in his hand. He lifts it to his lips and sips it slowly before asking, “Well? Do you think that was worth doing?”

  “I don’t know. Sophia seems kind of crazy. No one else will know what this means, but she will.” I twiddle the edge of the paper between my fingers and look over it at him. “What do you want her to do, exactly?”

  Cole takes a deep breath and sits at the table. The open floorplan makes it feel like he’s not that far away. The living room bumps up against the dining room, and the couch where I’m sitting is positioned in between. “I want her to drop the lawsuit, but I don’t think that’ll happen.” He looks at the black liquid in his mug. “Ya know, I can’t help but notice that you didn’t accept my proposal until after it was confirmed that I’d lose everything.” He looks up at me. “I wasn’t going to fight back, they seized my assets, and I lost many of my clients, and then you decided to stick around.” He sounds like he can’t believe it. He looks at me from under his brow, the steaming cup in his hand.

  His tone worries me. It makes my stomach clench and twist. “Money doesn’t matter to me, Cole. You have to know that by now. All my life, it’s been this poison hanging over my head. I take what I need and nothing more.” I shrug away the defensive feeling that’s coming over me. “I just don’t want it.”

  “You’re afraid of it.”

  “Maybe,” I say honestly. “There’s a duality with money, like you can chose to have money or love, but you can’t have both. They negate each other, or at least it seems that way to me. So yeah, maybe your money terrifies me a little bit.” I look up at him. The expression in his dark eyes is difficult to read. I can’t tell if I offended or amazed him. Funny how those look so similar sometimes.

  Cole’s eyes lower. He looks at his mug as he speaks. “That’s part of the reason why I didn’t fight back with Sottero. I really didn’t want to. I thought I was being like my father, crushing a woman I already shattered. I never told Sophia that I was disinherited before I proposed to her. I couldn’t, and she had no idea. It hit her like a train. The ring wasn’t even taken out of the box. She slapped it from my hand, put it under her car, and ran it over. The look she gave me, Anna—damn—for the longest time I thought I deserved whatever she threw my way. My fortune, all of it was made because she inspired me in the first place.”

  A string of images form in my mind. A young Cole returning from the army, wearing that uniform. The Tiffany’s box that was battered and locked in his safe. I blink these things away. They’re his ghosts and I wish they didn’t haunt him, but they do. I’m quiet for a moment and then something he’d said to me clicks into place. He owes her. He said it. He thinks that he’s indebted to her in a way he can’t repay. My mouth hangs open for a second and I think I understand. “She gave you your camera?”

  He nods. “After I came back from the military, I was listless. I had nothing to do and nowhere to live. Sophia thought that I was on an international vacation for four years. I didn’t correct her. I couldn’t. She thought that I had no job because of my status, that I was a playboy like the papers made me out to be.” His eyes flick up to me. “Maybe I shouldn’t be talking about this, but I wanted you to know how I felt about it. I deserved what I got from Sophia, as far as I was concerned. I did fuck her over, in a manner of speaking. And the gag on speaking about the agreement to use my name and my disownment made it so I couldn’t respond. I deserve this Anna.” The way he says it makes my heart ache. I slip off the couch and hobble over to him. Cole’s eyes seek mine, looking for answers that he can’t find.

  I sit in the chair next to him and take his hands in mine. “Listen, I don’t pretend to know what’s right and what’s wrong here. I hear the guilt in your voice when you talk about her, but Cole, I just don’t see it. Even if you led her on to think you were still the heir—which I don’t think you did—it’s been twenty years. She should have let it go by now. Even if she was burned, it’s unthinkable to stay mad this long.”

  “I thought she loved me, Anna,” he says, but I can hear it. He means, Will you leave me, too? Have I deceived you so gravely that you’ll crush me as well?

  The thread of insecurity is just that, a tiny string that tugs at Cole’s past and connects to his present. I want to snap it. I want to cut that thread and let things fall where they may. “There’s nowhere I’d rather be right now, than here with you. I’m not going anywhere. And if there’s ever a time that we have too much money, that it’s getting between us, we’ll fix it.”

  “How?”

  “We’ll give it away. Cole, this is about us, now. I’m not Sophia. I want you for you—all of your kinky, sophisticated, sexy self—I want you. Nothing will ever change my mind. You think I’d share my name with just anyone?” I grin at him.

  “You’re too good for me.”

  I laugh. “I’d say the same thing about you. Apparently we both make each other better. Isn’t that what love is all about? It seems we stumbled on the fairytale without even trying.”

  Cole smiles at me and something changes. I hear it in his voice when he speaks, “So, how far do you want to push this lawsuit? You want to just get her to back off or what?”

  “Sophia’s reputation is hanging by a thread. I think that’ll do the most damage, if you want to do damage.” I think about Sophia and how horrible she is, how incredible arrogant and bitchy she acts. Her clients are leaving her. They can’t get away fast enough. One spark will ruin what she has left.

  “Let’s see where we stand tomorrow and decide from there.” Cole puts his coffee down and pulls me onto his lap. He kisses the side of my face, and then holds me tight. I love every second of it.

  CHAPTER 9

  “Miss Lamore, you mean to tell me that you have never seen any photographs or negatives of my client, Ms. Sottero, wearing this ring?” The lawyer is as nasty as Sophia. She’s a middle-aged lady with her dark blonde hair tied in a tight chignon at the base of her neck. Her gray suit fits her bean-pole body like a glove.

  I shake my head and repeat myself, “No. I told you already.” Cole’s lawyer told me not to lie on the stand and I’m not. I didn’t see Sophia in any recognizable state, on a photograph or negative wearing that ring. I saw a naked chick on canvas wearing that ring.

  The lawyer is exasperated. She comes at me again, her perfect face cracking with lines of fury. She presses her palms together. I look at the judge for a second, but he seems bored. The old guy is looking at something in front of him. I wonder what it is before I look back at Blondie. “Miss Lamore. May I remind you
that you are under oath?”

  “You already have.”

  “Then, I must ask you to tell the truth. For the last time, did you or did you not see this ring in a photograph or negative of Sophia Sottero while you were in Cole Steven’s apartment?” Blondie presses her pointer fingers to her lips and stares at me. If her eyes had lasers, I’d be dead.

  “No,” I say fervently, “I did not.” I look to my lawyer who squashes Blondie’s next needling of me since my answer is still no.

  “Very well, Miss Lamore. Do you care to tell me how or why you recognized the ring my client was wearing the day you quit your internship at Sottero?”

  “Why does this matter?” I blurt out.

  Blondie opens her mouth to speak, but Cole’s lawyer is on her feet. They quibble back and forth and eventually Cole’s lawyer wins. I glance at Sophia. She looks mortified. I assume that Cole doesn’t let his lawyer off the leash, ever.

  “Enough,” the judge utters. “If you have no further questions of this witness, that pertain to this case, she may be excused.”

  Blondie bites her lip and returns to her seat. The judge hurries me off. I leave the stand and exit the courtroom. Reporters aren’t allowed near the courtroom, but they are close enough to snap pictures of me as I walk out. Ignoring them, I turn and walk the other way.

  My heart is thumping. I’m lucky she didn’t ask the questions differently. Sottero must have thought I saw something else. Maybe she doesn’t know her photographs are paintings? I think about things as I stroll through the halls. I don’t know how much time has passed, but I’m aware that I lapped the building as I approach the ladies room. I don’t know how much longer Cole will be in there today. I walk into the ladies room to check my make-up. My eyes itch like crazy. The building has that old musty scent that makes my eyes water. I stand in front of the mirror trying to rub my eyes without messing up my eyeliner and mascara. I give up and rub like crazy, smearing one eye. After it stops tearing, I take a few things from my purse, intending on fixing it when I hear Sophia’s voice behind me.