Perfect Imperfections Read online

  The memory of that morning hit Kim hard and she felt a sinking feeling in her heart. She had put her family under pressure to accept Dave and her relationship and they had. They had not just accepted him but had grown to love him and depend on him in many ways. And he had done more than expected of him, so why wouldn’t they love him? He was a nice guy. Kim felt her heart sink. She made her dying father accept her relationship only to throw it all away. She felt her pillow get wet, not realizing how long it had been since she had been crying.

  A sudden thought hit Kim — would Richard have wanted her to be with anyone if she was not happy? But was she not happy with Dave? She was. She was just not happy with herself. And, no matter who she would have been with at the time, things would have happened in no different way. Sometimes you have to let the moment decide on how things pan out in life. This night had suddenly lifted weight off her that she had been carrying for almost a year. She felt better, no matter how selfish she may have appeared to the rest of the world, but she was being honest with herself and that was a good place to start.

  I need to get my life back together because, right now, the train has been derailed for way too long. She though and got up and looked at herself in the mirror. It had certainly been too long.

  ***

  “Just to remind you, dinner at Il Donaccino. Be there by 7:30,” Sam said and hurried away for work a little early than her usual time.

  “She must have plans to meet Rob before work, Maa. Relax, she is a grownup.” Kim pecked her mom on the forehead as she took her cup of coffee and sat by the window.

  “Yes, you both are grownups and I get that. But both of you should also know that in my eyes you are just as little as you were when I had got you home.”

  “Maa” Kim rolled her eyes and groaned.

  CHAPTER 17

  Kim got ready by six thirty and left to pick Judith from her work. Her cream colored sleeveless overalls and blue heels were paired well with her slim blue belt and dangling gold earrings. Kim had not dressed up like this in a long time and that in itself helped lift her spirits. She was determined to get a grip over her life and this was the perfect time to start. She picked up Judith on the way and reached the restaurant in time, and then were escorted to the table that Rob had reserved. Rob and Sam were already there.

  “Ma!” Sam got up from her chair and took a few steps forward to greet Judith and Kim. “Maa, Kim this is Rob. Rob, this is my mom Judith and this is Kim, my dear sister.”

  “It’s so nice to finally get to meet you. I didn’t know you were Sam’s sister.” Rob got up to greet them. “What would you like to drink?”

  “Wine would be fine,” Kim said as she settled herself into the chair.

  Rob was stripped of all inhibitions when he was fired questions after questions from Kim even though she kind-of knew him already. Judith had been quiet, but she made observations. She was good at it too. By the end of the evening, she would know more than enough about Rob and it would have been as close as one could get to know another person in their first meet.

  She liked Rob. She saw he was fond of Sam and it was best to leave it at that for now. But what made Judith happier was that Kim was actively taking part in today’s outing, contrary to the routine of having to drag her out, which Judith was getting tired of. Kim was beginning to forgive herself, and that thought was a relief in itself. Her life had been turned upside down in the last 3 years and these were the first signs that things were finally beginning to settle. But had she not thought of the same thing when Dave had wanted her consent to propose to Kim? She had been so wrong then. The thought made her feel uneasy and she took another big gulp of wine, wishing that she could drown her doubts in it.

  ***

  The way back was a quiet ride, and even though the silence was becoming unbearable, Sam didn’t want to give in to whatever the Kim and Judith were planning. It was clearly not like them to be so quiet. Perhaps they needed time to go over the night. The dinner was perfect except for Kim being overly chatty. Why did she decide to break her months-long silence only tonight? She made Rob a little uneasy with the number of questions she threw at him. But he had handled himself very well. He did, and she really liked that.

  Sam couldn’t bear it any longer. The minute they got home, she burst out, “Okay, so come out with it Kim—what have you to say about Rob? You were horrible to him tonight.” She kicked her heels off and flopped onto the sofa. “What did he ever do to you? You were never this way. You were behaving like….” Sam stopped herself from completing the remaining of that sentence.

  “Like Dave, you mean?” Kim said so casually that it shocked Judith and Sam and they stood still for a moment. “Well,” Kim continued as she removed her shoes and sat on the couch next to Sam. “Dave is no longer in our lives. I am thankful to him that he took care of us for so long, but it’s time that we learnt to look after ourselves and each other. And in line with that,” she pointed to the sofa in front of her and nodded towards it, indicating to Judith that she should join them too. “I needed to check if this guy was any good.” She started removing her earrings. Sam cleared her throat but struggled to find her voice, but Kim continued, “And I think Rob is solid, like Dave would have put it.” She smiled at Sam and looked at Judith.

  “Mom?” Sam finally said looking at Judith. “I liked him.” Judith said. “But how serious are you?” Judith was probably hoping that her daughter was not already thinking of marrying a guy she had met only recently. She would have loved it if it turned out that way, but she knew the dangers of marrying someone without knowing them well.

  “Well, I intend to date him, and I didn’t want to hide that from either of you. Not that I hide these things, as you already know.” She winked at Kim slyly.

  The casualness of the mention of Dave’s name left Sam and Judith in shock, but they didn’t want to show any excitement or interpret the mention of his name in any manner. They had spent too much time in trying to understand what went on in Kim’s mind and they had repeatedly been surprised so it was left up to Kim to tell them what things meant when she was ready to tell them.

  Kim would never know the entirety of the effect her breakup with Dave had on the people close to her. It did not just change the equation between Kim and Dave, but it also changed for everyone. While theirs ended along the fault line of Kim’s imperfection, there were others who strengthened theirs.

  CHAPTER 18

  “Relationships are hard.” Bill said to console Beth, who was clearly more upset about things than she was willing to show. The abrupt proposal and the subsequent break-up had left Beth a little unnerved. “Things can be very different for one person in a relationship than they are for the other. You know that. How one could be completely clueless on what the other felt!” Beth nodded in agreement and looked up with her damp eyes.

  “I don’t want to ever be in that situation ever.” She got up and walked straight towards Bill and hugged him tight. Bill couldn’t agree more that he never wanted to be in that situation either. He hugged Beth too, and rubbed her back slowly, remembering how far their relationship had come but he couldn’t take that for granted, even though Beth had been with him in some tough situations, and often against the wishes of her parents but relationships are hard. He held her tighter.

  ****

  Bill didn’t want to slump his spirits with what happened to others and especially not tonight. Tonight, he wanted to celebrate his love and the thought of Beth made him smile ear to ear. He walked across the hall and shouted out, “Go home, Dave.” as he crossed Dave’s office. He rushed down and met Beth who was already in the driveway. “You look beautiful.” He said as he sat in the car and pecked her on the check. Beth put the car in drive and steered out. Bill, fastened his seatbelt and said, “You know, I missed you a lot over this trip. Do you remember how we were in the initial days of our dating and how you never wanted me to meet your family because I had dropped out of college?” He looked at Beth who had a broad smile
on her face. Glancing at Bill, she gave a slight giggle and looked straight ahead at the road.

  “Yes, back then, I feared my freedom, if my family had ever got to know I even spoke to a college dropout!”

  She paused and took another glance at Bill. “But we have come a long way from that. You have got an MBA degree and hold an important position in a reputed company. For God’s sake, you work with someone like Dave. He has the credibility of a saint. Just being with him, even in a small way, can give anybody some credibility. And then you have your own place. My family is very fond of you and, most importantly, you make me very happy.”

  Bill looked straight ahead at the road, “Yes, we have come a long way. And I owe a lot of it to you.”

  “I should say ‘rubbish’, but false modesty is just… well rubbish,” she chuckled. “Sorry, you were saying?” she nudged him to continue.

  “You anchored me when I most needed it,” he said. “You made me a better person. Your naivety and simplicity was infectious.” He rubbed his stubble and continued, “You know, in the initial days, I would often feel bad that I would spoil someone so pure.” He took her hand and squeezed it as he continued in a soft voice, “And that made me correct my ways.”

  They were close to the restaurant now. The traffic was light, and he knew it had to be now. He turned towards Beth, “Beth, can you pull over to the side?”

  She looked at him quizzically. “Everything okay?” she asked. Beth asked as she checked into the rearview mirror and pulled over.

  “Yes, yes,” said Bill, turning back to fetch his laptop bag. He took out the ring, but held his hands back as he turned the light on in the car and held Beth’s hands. Pulling his hand back he held box that was blue as a robin’s egg, and flipped it open. “Marry me, Beth,” he said softly. The princes-cut diamond with tiny little diamonds surrounding it popped out from the depths of the box. Beth looked at the ring, and then looked back at Bill. Her large brown eyes grew wider and she clasped her mouth with both her hands.

  “Bill,” she finally got herself to say as tiny drops of tears lurked at the edge of her eyes, threatening to drop any moment. She closed her eyes and nodded. She mouthed a ‘yes’, but there was no voice. She was shocked, pleasantly shocked. Bill took the ring out of the box and placed in on the ring finger. He held her hands and pulled her towards him. Holding her by the face, he kissed her tear-stained face swallowing them. They sat there hugging each other for a while.

  “Are you cold? You are shivering,” said Bill and wrapped her tighter in his arms, rubbing her hands.

  “Yeah.” She laughed through the tears that were rolling down now. “It’s silly to cry like this.”

  “No, it isn’t!” Bill’s voice caught in his throat.

  In the calm quietness of the car, Beth felt so content. She was with the man she loved as much as her next breath, and he had just asked her to marry him. She closed her eyes and the last remaining tears stained her cheeks. “When did you?” she finally managed to say. Pulling away from him and looking at the ring glittering in the tiny light of their car, “When did you… Oh, this is so beautiful!”

  She noticed the color of the diamonds and the roses carved in the band. She kissed him. They held each other for a while, and then decided they better get to the restaurant before someone noticed their car parked by the road with lights on.

  At the restaurant they ordered a bottle of champagne and toasted to their recent engagement. They decided not to call either their family or their friends until the next morning. They wanted to soak in the night that was completely theirs.

  ***

  The next morning, was a contrast of the night before. It was loud and caustic, and there was a lot of crying. Finally, the family was done and it was time for friends.

  “That was exhausting.” Beth sat next to Bill on the couch and placed the mobile on the side-table next to their photograph. She lifted the frame, tracing its edges, and looked at their picture from years ago — she, with wind-blown hair and no makeup, seated next to Bill, who always looked camera-ready. This was her favorite picture. It still had to sink in that she was now engaged to this man after all odds.

  “You okay?” Bill looked at her and squeezed her into a side hug.

  “Yeah! It’s all just happening… I don’t know?”

  “Too fast for you?”

  “No, I don’t think we can call this too fast,” she teased him. “Fifteen years of dating and courtship is not really fast.”

  “Good!” Bill said nonchalantly, “it’s not going to be easy to stay with me, I was giving you time.” He pretended to read the newspaper.

  “Yeah, I needed the time.”

  “So, are you done with everyone from your side of the family?”

  “Yes, everyone that I needed to tell. Mummy will take care of the rest. She is going crazy with ideas. Whipping them out of thin air, but I am sure she has been at them for years.” She placed the frame back. “When do we tell our friends?”

  “How would you feel about inviting them for dinner, maybe tonight?”

  “That’s short notice! It’s Thursday; people might already have plans for tonight.”

  “We can see how many are available and then take a call. I’ll call you from office and let you know if this is happening. You speak to your girls.”

  ***

  The day dragged on, but was frequently punctuated by calls that Bill and Beth made to each other the whole day. It was almost double the number of times that they called each other on a regular day, which was already a lot for normal people. To their relief, it was the weekend and they would have enough time away from the cares of the world, in their ‘engaged bubble’.

  Beth left work a little earlier than usual and spent an awful lot of time deciding what she would wear that evening. She picked out a chic knee-length dress and paired it with matching earrings and a clutch. Her badge-high heels would complete the look. She wished she could call Cheryl for some advice on it tonight, but then that would mean letting her on to the news before the others. And they had decided they didn’t want to face their friends’ wrath for telling one before the other. So, for now, Beth would have to just do this herself. “It was so much easier to have Cheryl decide what and how to wear things,” she mumbled to herself.

  CHAPTER 19

  “You think we should let Kim know that Dave would be there and probably with a female friend?” Beth fiddled with her phone in the elevator of Le Méridien hotel.

  “I don’t see the need and anyway it’s too late now. Moreover, Kim is a smart person. I am sure she knows I would invite Dave, no matter what their relationship is. Kim will have to just deal with it.”

  Bill had made that conclusion every time they talked about the possibility of Dave and Kim being in close proximity of each other. And here they were. Kim was already here with Cheryl and Sam when they walked in, followed by Dave with a pleasant-looking woman.

  The group of immediate friends greeted one another and settled into their seats, making it appear as normal as possible. Kim and Dave were also seated at the same table, but the silent looks that were being exchanged were enough to put everyone at unease. Sam got up, deciding that someone needed to acknowledge that he was here and moved towards Dave to greet him.

  “Dave!” Sam spurted across the room and gave him a quick hug, “It has been forever since I saw you.” Sam said as though nothing had ever happened, but Dave and Kim knew Sam too well. They both knew she was being loud and casual so that it would make everyone else behave normally around them, and that would put both Kim and Dave at ease and not feel like they are being judged by their friends.

  And it worked like a charm. Everyone came about talking normally to Dave as they had done before. Everyone steered clear of anything that could be uncomfortable. Kim stayed at one end of the lounge and Dave on the other end.

  Finally Beth arrived and when she did, Bill asked the bartender to have a glass of champagne for everyone. They were already at the dinn
er table, and Bill got up. Clearing his throat, he began, “I am so happy that all of you are here. I have not seen any of you since over two weeks, except Dave, and that’s because he happens to be my boss too. Okay, so getting back on to the point… Each one of you has been our close friend, and we have seen each other through good and bad times.” He paused and looked at Beth, holding her hand and clasping her palms into his, he kissed her hand. “So it is only right that you all are here for this special moment of ours.” He held up Beth’s hand. “Last night I asked my love to marry me and she said yes!”

  The room was all of a sudden filled with a deafening noise and utter confusion. They all got up to congratulate the two beaming newly-engaged couple. Yet, there was very little that had changed, so as to say, other than the rock around Beth’s finger.

  Finally, when everyone had calmed down and dinner had been served, Beth told everyone how Bill had proposed. It may not have been exotic but it was intimate, which, given how overtly expressive they were of their feelings for each other, was quite a surprise to everyone. The night came to a close for everyone and they went home. But the night had been very difficult for Dave and Kim.

  ***

  Dave had felt the urge to walk up to Kim and demand answers to the many questions he had asked himself for the past several months. He had not allowed himself enough time to deal with the hurt. He had plunged himself into a sea of work, which had worked exceptionally well for his work, as it had grown considerably. But it had also taken a toll on him.

  And amidst all this, he had found someone he was getting comfortable with. Dave was 13 years older than Kim and never before had it been so obvious than today. It looked like they belonged from different eras. He was calm and polished, and currently with a woman with whom he shared a lot more things in common.